steve rogers is literally the definition of “learning on the job” that idiot spent months touring around w a performance group selling bonds and then he’s like “i’m gonna sneak into a hydra base with ZErooooooOO Training lol”
bucky, later: man am i glad u found us, how’d u do it? they like train u for this? did u come up with a plan or something based off of a building blue print? steve, a man with No Plan: i’m strong and have a Fantastic sense of direction bucky, realizing that he and the rest of the 107th are alive purely bc of luck and steve’s stubborness:
Using tumblr slang around real people makes for some interesting miscommunication
*points to dumpster* same energy
My poor co-worker: wat
Me: the fire alarm testing is giving me war flashbacks
Me: from like, dormlife
My long suffering therapist: we’ve talked about this
Me: asdfghjjhgfgj
Sister: how are you doing that with your mouth
*in a complete deadpan* I am literally crying right now
I’ve started using more odd and specific threats I’ve seen on tumblr like “i’m going to steal your pancreas for making that pun” or “if you eat my leftovers I will cut the toes out off all of your socks” my friends think it’s hysterical and people my parents age usually give me a frightened “you’ll WHAT?” oddly old people also find it hysterical and usually have witty comebacks
threatening to cut the toes off of socks is the scariest threat by far
I forgot to finish this story, anyways I have food alarms set throughout the day to remind me to eat. My alarm is the exact same as my ringtone, so when my mom called me earlier instead of answering my mom I went to the kitchen and made myself a sandwich.
naruto: i will literally do anything to get sasuke back. like u can cut my legs and my arms off and my head off and then take out my eyes and shit and i WILL fight with every last breath to take him back from orochimaru. 😀 dattebayo
yamato, second day on his job as temp team leader:
if a professor brags about how hard it is to pass their class then drop the class. they should not be proud of being bad at conveying information to students. you’re not paying thousands of dollars to fail. find a professor that wants you to pass.
THIS^^^
My grandfather was a professor and there was another professor in the same department who was notorious for his low pass rate. One time they were talking and this dude was bragging about how hard his classes were, and my grandpa was just like: “your classes aren’t hard, you’re just bad at your job. If your students aren’t passing, no matter the subject, it’s because you’re not teaching.” He never spoke to my grandfather again.
fadeslikewhispers 