What I want to see is a mutual pining fic where everyone else knows they’re in love and have been for ages… because everyone else thinks they’re already together.
scenarios:
it being assumed that each member of the pair will plan the other’s birthday parties
the pining pair getting each other “consolation” Valentine’s Day gifts
the friend group inviting the pair to a wedding without a plus-one option
the friend group inviting the pair to stay over and only supplying one bed, because of course they only need one bed
friend group using one member of the pair as an answering machine for the other person
the pair answering questions like “do you ever think about getting married” with a resounding no because if they admit yes, they’ll end up gushing all their secret hopes and dreams regarding the other one, and the other one doesn’t want to get married anyway, so the point is moot
enough people asking why they don’t live together that they end up moving in together, relieved they weren’t the one to bring it up
the parents of one inviting the other to all family gatherings and it being established which way they share on holidays
whenever someone asks a member of the pair, alone, why they haven’t moved to the next stage of their relationship, the person responds that they’re afraid to lose the other and all that jazz, with everyone on entirely different pages as to what “the next stage” means
they’re each other’s emergency contact, for all those H/C opportunities
MORE THOUGHTS ON ASSUMED RELATIONSHIP TROPE
the siblings of one referring to the other as their sibling too (ditto for nieces/nephews/niblings)
parents of one insisting on taking the other one out for their birthday, too
parents dropping hints about grandchildren (adult child assumes it’s about their single status, presumed partner assumes it’s due to how they’re considered a family member who could also provide “grandchildren”)
seating arrangements always putting the two together (meals, movies, car rides)
follow-up to above: when there aren’t enough seats, one is expected to sit on the other’s lap when the other couples combine thusly
all their profile pics are of them together
the friend group intercedes when one of them gets flirted with by someone else because of the sheer level of awkward the pair exude
friend group members asking them (separately) for romantic advice in the certainty that they have it figured out, what with the awesome relationship
double-dates forever where they end up sitting next to each other while the other couple makes out during the movie
one ordering food/drink for the second while the second is in the restaurant/bar bathroom
ordering food with the assumption of sharing (bonus points for person being protective of their food against everyone else except their presumed partner)
one keeping track of the other’s allergies/medications and being the first to remind friend group about where the other can eat, etc.
friend group gets them both a pet/large gift/household item (bonus points of it’s for only ONE of their birthdays and not a gift-giving holiday)
POTENTIAL PLOT RESOLUTIONS
Add more tropes:
they need to fake date for something and are bewildered when no one notices
one of them needs to get married for a green card wedding. Whether they’re surprised or grateful when their entire friend group instantly confirms their cover story is up to you
THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED (as provided by the friend group)
OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES (as talked into by the friend group)
a friend who is a writer openly says in an interview that their popular romantic couple is based on them
One person realizes:
Person A confesses love of Person B to Friend A. Friend A just assumed they were always together, and maybe the lack of sex is just because Person B is asexual(?). We progress into Didn’t Know They Were Dating trope with Person A assuming they were the one who didn’t know (but their partner totally does, right?)
OPTIONAL the same exact conversation takes place between Person B and Friend B as well.
BONUS POINTS if Person A and Person B pretend they both knew they were dating the entire time so as not to hurt the other’s feelings.
ALTERNATE BONUS POINTS if neither is actually asexual, have the truth come out when one person refers to the other as ace and it spirals into “But YOU’RE ace!” “But I thought YOU were ace!” and the UST of cuddling is abruptly resolved
Misc:
friend group realizes and Much Ado About Nothing Ensues
for Contrived Plot Reasons (unicorns, spells, etc), the virginity of one is made public and the assumption is revealed
Person A goes on a date with someone else and the entire friend group is AGHAST AT THIS CHEATING, but Person B is just resigned and going “I just want them to be happy…” while everyone shouts to not give up on their love
new friend in friend group just outright asks, spawning massive confusion
Please drink water and eat plenty fruits so you can also taste as good as your partner.
Please Exfoliate both your face AND body.
Please Wash, Deep Condition, AND Detangle!
Please try not use hair care products that say “Men” because they use the same fragrance as AXE which is harmful to both your skin and scalp. And ITSTINKS.
ITS OKAY TO SMELL LIKE FRUITS. SHEA BUTTER OR FLOWERS. SMELL HAS NO DAMN GENDER.
There are ‘masculine’🙄 natural scents also; Eucalyptus, Sandalwood, Sage, Peppermint, etc.
MOISTURIZE EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY. ESPECIALLY YOUR LIPS.
Point is….take care of yourself…damn.
Toxic/hyper masculinity is so bad men can’t even take care of themselves without it being considered “gay” or frowned upon in some form of fashion smh
Exactly! It should be something we should all encourage and not frown up when we see a man doing a facial or getting a pedicure. It’s perfectly normal to want your outside to reflect the inside.
You may have heard about the efforts in Europe to reform copyright law. The debate has been ongoing in the European Parliament for months. If approved next week, these new regulations would require us to automatically filter and block content that you upload without meaningful consideration of your right to free expression.
We respect the copyrights and trademarks of others, and we take all reports seriously to ensure that your creative expression is protected. We make this clear in our Community Guidelines. There’s already a legal framework that works and is fair: Todaywe take down posts and media that contain allegedly infringing content when we receive a valid DMCA (Digital Millennium Copyright Act) takedown request. We also provide clear-cut ways for people to fight back if they believe their removed content was not a true violation. These instances are monitored and reported and live in our biannual transparency report.
The suggestion to use automated filters for issues of copyright is short-sighted at best and harmful at worst. Automated filters are unable to determine whether a use should be considered “fair use” under the law and are unable to determine whether a use is authorized by a license agreement. They are unable to distinguish legitimate parody, satire, or even your own personal pictures that could be matched with similar photographs that have been protected by someone else. We don’t believe that technology should replace human judgment.
Tumblr is and always has been a place for creative expression, and these new regulations would only make it harder for you to express yourself with the freedom and clarity you do so now.
If you access Tumblr from Europe and want to act, you can find more information on saveyourinternet.eu.
Please reblog this as much as you reblogged the posts about Net Neutrality.
If Article 13 is approved, European People might be basically banned from uploading any fan content.
You won’t get new fanfics from people in Europe.
You won’t get new gifs from people in Europe.
You won’t get new fanart from people in Europe.
Because they’ll be automatically filtered and blocked!
We might leave Tumblr and other fandom pages.
And if we’re getting all our content blocked?
You might lose some of your favourite followers/mutuals.
You might not get to read the rest of that fic you’re dying to read – simply because the writer lives in the wrong country.
So do whatever you can to help us stop this.
Reblog this.
CONTACT YOUR REPRESENTATIVES TO TELL THEM YOU DON’T WANT ARTICLE 13 TO BE APPROVED IF YOU’RE EUROPEAN! DO IT VIA THE HOMEPAGE
SIGNAL BOOST PLEASE
THIS IS IMPORTANT AGAIN
Reblog friends!!!
reblogging again because our govern is shit please help us
Or they need a girlfriend that doesn’t mind listening and trying to help them work through their shit and defeat their fucking demons without asking them to pour out their soul to a stranger who is only listening because it’s their job. That’s the kind of shit you do for the people you love.
your partner is not your therapist. listening to your partner is one thing, but it is not their responsibility to help you work through your shit. that is on you.
one more time.
your partner is not your therapist.
also if I may hop onto this, I REALLY hate when people try to spin “therapists only listen because it’s their job” as a BAD thing. can you imagine if we tried to apply that to literally any other profession?
“why take your phone into the store to get it fixed? they don’t care about you, they’re only doing their job.”
“I don’t want to order a pizza. they’re not making it for me out of the goodness of their hearts, they’re only doing it because it’s their job.”
“why didn’t you just have your girlfriend do that surgery instead of going to a stranger who only saved your life because it’s their job?”
it’s their job because they are better equipped to do it than the other people in your life. jesus christ.
men’s loyalty to violence is disturbing. when women want a life free of abuse, assault, threat, & coercion, men’s first suggestion is “learn to fight back. learn to defend yourself”. i don’t want my life to be a fight. i don’t want to “prove myself” through inflicting pain & fear.
i don’t find violence and physical conflict fulfilling or self-actualising.
fadeslikewhispers 