Universal experiences that prove why D&D is both the best and worst game ever:
“Make a stealth check.” “45.” “Your character just stops existing.”
“Now he’s gonna attack you, and—aw, fuck!” “Did you roll a nat—“ “I rolled a nat 1.”
“That’s 34 points of damage.” “I’m dead.” “You’re not dead—“
“I’m gonna cast [every AoE spell ever] on that guy.” “Hey! I’m standing right next to him!” “You’ve got a lot of HP, you’ll be fine.”
“I’m not sure you can do tha—“ “Nat 20.” “…you do that, I guess.”
“Wait, can I go ask [enemy NPC] for info?” “No, you killed him. He’s super-dead! His blood is everywhere, he’s not talking.”
“Make a persuasion check.” “Well I rolled a 2, but with my modifier it’s a 25.” “Nobody is allowed to play a bard next campaign.”
“You’re not proficient in that.” “Can I still try?” “…sure.”
“Come on guys, you almost had it.” “It’s been 45 minutes. Can you just tell us the answer?” “No. I believe in you. Now solve my puzzle.”
And, of course, the greatest one of all:
“…[heavy sigh]. Roll for seduction.”
When your spouse is a voice actor….
Harry Shum Jr: Alright I’m about to cook some dinner right no-
Shelby Rabara [in her Peridot voice]: No one wants to eat your dinner you clod.My future husband will have to deal with the same thing…
=w=b
Im crying they’re so cute
they are!!!!!
deleting your vent post 3 minutes after compulsively writing it
what label do you identify with?
i identify with laundry care labels cause i know people actually should be doing but they ignore me and fuck shit up anyway
soup can labels
how so
emptied easily and thrown out afterwards
Choking hazard labels. If you ignore me you could get hurt or die.
Any labels, cuz I usually just take em off and throw em in the trash
Shampoo bottle labels, because you only read me when youre bored or cant find anything better.
getting a little too real now
(via meanboysclub)
The last one
Also good on these people for taking the aggressively petty route instead of falsely registering their pets as service animals
And one of the reasons I love my state and assure people that not all New Yorkers are assholes.
me: im bored what should i do
my brain: here’s something productive that u have been procrastinating on doing for literally three mont-
me: haha u wild. anyways only realistic suggestions please
“Most dangerous monster? Well, vampires are pretty easy–just carry pencils. Ghosts are mostly irritants, werewolves collapse at silver, and dragons keep to themselves… Naw, it’s one no one expects. It’s–”
Entitled white boys who were told no.
fadeslikewhispers 