chamber of secrets au where fred and george steal ginny’s diary bc “haha ginny why are you keeping a diary omg its old and blank” and they just start drawing dicks in it and then the dicks fade off the paper and fred and george just look at each other and go “omg infinite dicks” so they draw dicks on it all year until the diary literally ink vomits itself to death bc tom riddle cant handle the dicks anymore and no one ever opened the chamber of secrets and fred and george destroyed the very first horcrux the end
This is my legacy
#dicksoutfortomriddle
in 124,000 notes no one has added a caption so completely wonderful and succint and beautiful and goddamn perfect ive been laughing for 15 years thank you
diary: stolen
pages: self-erasing
dicks: outTOM MARVOLO RIDDLE IS FORCIBLY REMOVED FROM THE HORCRUX
Tag: YELLING
RFA +Sarean reacts to MC getting cat called?
-smiles-
–R.I.
When MC Gets Cat-Called…
Yoosung
- A bit scared to confront the guys, but also upset they were
disrespecting you- Glares at the men who were still checking out your body
- “Hey, it’s disrespectful to treat women like that,” he
scowls- The men who straighten up and walk towards Yoosung, boasting
their height- “You should respect us, little boy,” they snarl at him
- Yoosung holds their gaze, not backing down. “I’ll never respect anyone who looks at someone else as only an object of sexual
desire.”- Probably gets beaten up tbh
- But to him, it’s worth it.
V
- Doesn’t even hear it
- Rather, he’s just recovered from a successful eye surgery
and was looking forward to wander the streets freely again- And who better to be with than you?
- Sees a store selling cameras in the distance, and drags you
along excitedly- Unknowingly knocks over the man who had catcalled you into a
machoman prostitute who proceeded to flirt and strip for him- ಠ‿ಠ
ZEN
- Upset that you were being catcalled even though you were
dressing so conservatively (to avoid comments like these in the first place)- Ready to fight!
- But he holds back because you tell him to
- Sends a spine chilling glare at the men and leaves with a,
“Don’t ever talk about my girlfriend with you dirty mouth again, uglies.”- Leaves them in shock because well. Zen is seriously handsome
and it hurt to be called ugly by someone who was clearly out of your league- Zen asks if you’re okay afterward
- Reassures you that while you ARE beautiful, you definitely
don’t deserve that treatment- Tells you that you’re worth more than the one night stand
the assholes earlier had asked you for- You’re not all too bothered because you felt safe with Zen
by your side- Still, you ask out of curiosity, “Hey, since when was I your
girlfriend?”- He ends up blushing and avoids answering the question
Jaehee
- Finally time for her to show off the results of her judo
lessons!- Doesn’t hesitate to beat up the assholes immediately
- Seriously surprises you because Jaehee was always so logical,
calm and collected- You expected her to lecture them but no..
- She’s ruthless and doesn’t leave a single part of their body
without pain- “Is this the hand you wanted to touch her with?” she growls,
popping the ligaments of each finger on their hands. “Or is it this one…?”
proceeds to basically break the other hand as well- As she walks away, she purposely digs her heel into their
back, most likely leaving a mark- “Let’s go, MC. I’m sorry that wasted your time,” she said,
looking as if she hadn’t just beat up three men who were twice her sizeSaeran
- Like Jaehee, he acts on impulse and jumps at the guy who
called you out- Relentless punches
- Doesn’t help that Saeran ears all those decorative rings
- Only satisfied when the man’s face is all purple from
bruises- “No one will want to be with you now,” Saeran mocks him. “Not
that anyone ever did from the start.”- Lectures you to always call him if you ever ran into any uncomfortable
situation again707
- Hides his anger with a big smile
- “Oh, I know she’s a very sexy lady,” he says coolly, eyes
locked in on the man who had just said it- In a flash, Seven has the man’s pants pulled down
- “EEK! MY INNOCENT EYES!” Seven shrieks on purpose, faking a
small scream- Immediately catches attention from crowds of people on the
street immediately- They snap pictures of the man, murmurs of disgust and
amusement going around:- ‘Is this a prank…?’
- ‘He’s ugly…’
- ‘Poor girl, did he try
to flash her?’- Seven takes your hand and drags you away, whistling
innocently- “Well, that’s why you don’t catcall someone when the
Defender of Justice is around!! Justice! Is! Served!!”Jumin
- Confused.
- He doesn’t walk on the streets very often and is usually
escorted around by car- Unfamiliar with cat-calling
- “MC, is this normal among the common people?” he asks,
eyebrows furrowed- You nod, “Well, kinda… (unfortunately)”
- You didn’t expect Jumin to suddenly yell back at the other
guy, “HEY MAN! I THINK YOUR ASS LOOKS ‘FINE’ TOO!!”- Didn’t mean
it like that, Jumin…